Its Hard To Get Help When You’re Not Thin

So many people tell me that their eating problems aren’t taken seriously because they look normal or thin. Ann (not real name) said last week that she felt like a fraud sitting in an eating disorder group because she was the only person who wasn’t thin. She came to see us for an assessment. Afterwards she said

And so I haven’t fully believed that what “I” have is a proper eating disorder but rather what I have is just a problem, that just I have, that no-one has been able to help me with and that I should and will be able to sort out on my own at some point in the future. I realise now that is not the case, I deserve help, which is scary and overwhelming but also exciting and hopeful.

If you want an assessment by someone who understands all the faces of an eating disorder,  you can find it here with us.

Source The Metro

This movie about anorexia is dangerous

Lily Collins, who stars in To the Bone, suffered from an eating disorder as a teenager and lost weight under medical supervision for her role. The trailer for the film has been watched 2m timesThere is a movie about anorexia.

My biggest concern is letting a former sufferer get down to an anorexic weight after she has “recovered”.

My almost less big concern would be letting anyone else thin- down for a part like this. Oh actors do, like Tom Hanks, he got diabetes a few years later.

There are a lot of people who like to voyeur on mental health; we no doubt will see a few more odd movies shortly with purging into toilets or plastic bags or cutting holes out of themselves in the name of public interest. Some people even say it is useful. It destigmatises mental health (no it doesn’t); it inspires people to confess their difficulties (no it doesn’t) and it inspires sufferers to recover (no it doesn’t). I understand that some thinspiration idiots are rubbing their hands with glee about this movie and many might hope to learn some new tricks.

I understand that some people think it will be “triggering”

No doubt I will watch it, otherwise I won’t be able to comment if people ask me about it. But I would rather watch Planet Earth by David Attenborough to lift my spirits, rather than more behaviour which makes me sad and cross. I am exposed to enough human suffering for one lifetime even though my work is my passion, I need other things to remind me of the good and wonderful things in life. Recovery after all, is about tuning into other things in life, not endless infatuation with starving, emaciation, laxatives and purging.

Source: The Times 

I would Rather Be Deaf Than Fat

I would rather be deaf and dead than be fat gain 2 lbs.

‘I was living a life, but not living the life that I wanted. Every day my thoughts were consumed with food, over-exercising, calorie counting, label checking and fear. I could not concentrate or focus on a task without looking at the clock to indicate when the next snack or meal was due. The enthusiasm and motivation I had for life was sucked out of me, taking most of my ambition and interests with it’. (Jessica Mell)

That is what people with eating disorders say to me. I was thinking about that when I listened to this amazing music played by a very young boy.

Overweight people do experience the most awful stigma; every day every moment is a moment laden with possibilities for being shamed. But thinking you are fat is not the same as being overweight, and we all need to know the difference and stop listening to the fat demon in our head.  Listen to the music. Take a moment out of thinking and anguishing about food, calories, the next meal, the next binge, the next diet, the person on the train who is thinner than you, we might be able to live and banish eating disorders back to the hellhole where they belong.

Another Step Another Story for Anorexia Recovery

I’ve been sent a blog about anorexia recovery from Jessica Mell who tells me
“I am inviting you today to view my blog, engage with its content and use the platforms that you have in order to help me communicate with others; ultimately giving hope and support to those that are in need. I am passionate about making a positive difference to the way that mental health issues are viewed in society and to the support that is available”.

So here you are. If you want to take a step into anorexia recovery and start to live you might want to read Jessica’s blog. As I keep saying, it is not a crime to eat. Visit http://everystepanotherstory.blogspot.co.uk

Severe Anorexia: A Poem From A Carer

Charlie Williams fought severe anorexia for many years. At times her parents thought she would die. She has written a musical – ‘Strawberries are not enough’ about her experience which is being performed in Hampton in April 2017. Her father wrote a poem which is being sung during the musical. It is very beautiful and here it is

Verse If anything happened to you
That would be unbearable for us
Our lives would stop
And never be the same again

Verse That powerful voice of your mind
Is leading you somewhere you must not go
We see it all
You’re further down than you could know

Chorus You must listen to another voice
This voice is saying
Every time you eat you are not failing;
You are taking
A step towards your future all your hopes and dreams

If anything happened to you
We would be left in an empty place
So dark and cold
Don’t ever let us see that day

Darling listen now and hear our voice
Our voice is saying
Every time you eat
You’re not failing
You are taking
A step towards your future all your hopes and dreams

Thoughts About Orthorexia

Orthorexia   (Acknowledgement Steven Bratman)

An increasingly common condition in developed countries which has not been officially recognised and thus is not classified as an independent entity. The term Orthorexia comes from the Greek word orthos which means proper and orexia (appetite). It is characterized by pathological obsession for biologically pure or right food which leads to important dietary restrictions. Orthorexic people begin by eating well and then spiral into an obsession or fixation with goodness, purity, clean eating, and a certain smugness. They exclude food from their diets that they consider impure because of content such as animal meat or dairy food because they believe themselves intolerant or allergic or even righteous and moral. At its most extreme, health suffers, other interests diminish, relationships are affected and matters become dangerous at the worst. One orthorexic person said, I am painfully aware that I am a bore even if I strive for it to be a closet bore. I am no less aware than I am a type like many of my ilk- city living, and more than a tad a control freak.

 One well known former anorexic, now evolved into a Clean Eating protagonist said fiercely of her views that clean eating would “save the entire planet” Who wouldn’t be vegetarian!  Well it might save the planet but are there more urgent things to target first – like religious extremism and nuclear arms?

The association with eating disorders occurs where the dietary restriction is a proxy for weight loss or weight control. For example, some vegetarians avoid meat because of its so-called fat content, especially young women who instead of avoidance diets, need good quality protein and vitamins at a time when their brains and bodies are growing fast..

Orthorexic people share characteristics with anorexics such as perfectionism, maturity fears, asceticism, high levels of disgust and maturity fears. Like anorexics, orthorexics feel special and different regarding their eating habits, but would have extreme emotional reactions if dietary rules are breached. Some experts believe that Orthorexia is an “escape” from anorexia and only the degree of interference in life or episodic breaches of control would drive someone to accept help.

Susie Orbach, a well-known psychotherapist dislikes the term “Orthorexia” but says that it captures something about our cultural thrust to try and carve up food into ‘goods and bads’ like a more elegant version of the classic diet used to be. She says,  you think you are looking after yourself, but it can be the basis for feeling disturbed about foodstuffs that used to be taken for granted. Orthorexics’ claim to be healthy makes this kind of food management self-legitimising and it is also competitive. I would go back to basics and ask – what is the problem to which this is the solution? It is not medical – it is psychological.

If you avoid meat, fish, carbs, wheat, dairy food and so on, a psychologist might offer a differential diagnosis of delusional disorder, OCD, anxiety disorder and/or anorexia.

 

Are You Cursed By Perfectionism?

Flora Assistant Producer of 20-20  Productions is looking to interview anyone who feels that perfectionism has blighted their life and led to mental health issues.

I understand perfectionism and it has showed up a lot in my own life, but I have grown to manage it so that I can be happy and effective.

Perfectionism has a lot to answer for, it leads people into particular manias, such as the mania to be super thin, the mania to run marathons even if you are throwing up by the roadside, the mania to climb mountains even if your family need you at home, the mania to take part in cycle races even if you have to inject toxic substances to keep up. Eating disorders and the quest to be thin at all costs is a very particular kind of mania.

Viewing anorexia as a kind of mania is one way we look at the illness, in our quest to heal people and help them live more healthfully. But some people feel that the only way to survive is to follow a particular quest; for perfection in something that becomes important. Who wants to be ….. ordinary.

So if you want to help Flora email  flora.hamilton@twentytwenty.tv

T: +44 (0)203 301 8405

Understanding Internal States in People with Eating Disorders Can U Help?

A psychology master’s student at the University of East London, Jennifer McBride, is doing her thesis project on how experience of internal states may be related to the development, maintenance and prognosis of certain types of Eating Disorders. You can help contribute to this research by completing some online questionnaires and meeting with her in person to do some computer based activities and cognitive tests. 

 She is hoping to recruit a further 15-20 participants (over 18 years of age) with a diagnosis of Bulimia or Anorexia Nervosa to meet with over the next month.  More information about the study can be found on the following link and you can email Jennifer (u1345277@uel.ac.uk) if you have any questions or would like to sign up for the study. 

 

https://www.callforparticipants.com/study/NX6SG/internal-states-and-emotion-regulation-in-eating-disorders

 

 Your participation would be a huge help and very much appreciated.

 

Thanks for considering the above and for showing your support for the research. 

 

Very best wishes,

Jennifer 

The Clean Eating Lie

With acknowledgement from Giles Coren, writing in the Times whose words are copied in parts. The language contained isn’t Deanne’s.

Anyone looking at Clean Eating, The Dirty Truth BBC Horizon would have seen some of the main myths of clean eating demolished including “Dr” Robert Young’s Alkaline Diet message and health claims.

Every diet claims to be the one that works; F-Plan, Cabbage Soup, Dukan, etc etc. We all signed a great sigh of relief when each was discredited or shown not to work, and we said   “I’m not eating another mouthful of cabbage, steak, kale smoothie etc. again” and we dived straight back into eating whatever we most liked that we felt had been taken away from us under false pretences.

As political events have a long backlash well after the event has ended (e.g. Vietnam war),  the same backlash happens about the history of healthy eating. We were told 50 years ago that fat was bad for us (however it shows up) and people are still terrified of drinking real (whole) milk.

So why are the Brits so overweight? It is because the discrediting of each diet rings in our dumb brains as a de facto endorsement of everything it had prohibited.  “You see”  we cry “I always knew that the experts didn’t know what they are talking about” so we tuck in like never before. Because diets invented by morons ( to deal with their own personal physical problems) to cater for other morons or suckers,  are always discredited down the line, often by other morons who have even more moronic ideas. All they want is to pick up the morons who are looking around for the next quick fix says Coren.

Systems like clean eating, detoxes, kale smoothies, NEVER eat meat or you’re a bad person; are just invented by morons who want to turn your own failure to grasp the simple messages of good nutrition into money, and they are addling your brain.

We just need to be less stupid. The rules for eating properly and staying slim are so obvious that it makes my eyes bleed says Coren.

Just don’t eat things out of packets or wrappings. Don’t eat in front of a screen or on transport or in the street. Don’t eat standing up, without cutlery or from a box. Don’t eat anything delivered to your door or passed to you in a car through a hatch or because you saw it advertised on TV. Don’t eat just because you are bored and don’t eat anything which contains ingredients you cannot visualise. Above all don’t eat or even drink anything which your grandmother would not have recognised as food and drink. And don’t solve your problems in a bottle of alcohol.

Regarding the last paragraph, I agree with him with the exception of a bit of dark chocolate.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

We Need Your Help Please

dandelion seed in twilight

WE NEED YOUR HELP PLEASE!
I’m helping the British Psychological Society put through a big paper on eating disorders. This is going to We need to know in your own words what it is like to have and live with an eating disorder. We welcome any age and any ED.
You can tell us about good and bad experiences as well as what having an ED meant to you.
Best idea is to  email me Deanne on admin@ncfed.com and we will treat everything in confidence.
Please help us to help you. Email admin@ncfed.com or comment here